Do I Have to Do Everything?
by KoopalingFan
Summary: Yep, Dr. Mario unfortunately has to take care of a few Smashers, yet again thanks to Kirby. Though, it was not because he didn't like it, it was their attitudes. Wii Fit Trainer only made matters worse.


Do I Have To Do Everything?

 **For those of you who have read "Cruel"? You should know that it exposed my dark side when it comes to writing. However, I have promised on my profile that I will still be doing humor. But thanks to "Cruel" it made Hurt/Comfort one of my major genres I like to write about.**

 **Maybe in the future, I may even branch out even further and start doing Horror more, thanks to a certain friend of mine. Whoever can figure it out gets a sneak peak of my next oneshot!**

 **But for now, for those of you who have missed my humor fics, here it is. This time, it's all about Dr. Mario. Enjoy!**

 **~KF**

* * *

"Do I have to do everything around here?"

Yet, another fellow smasher of his was now in the Smash Mansion's infirmary. To him, it was as if he was his umpteenth patient he had to deal with. There were already five he had yet to take care of.

"You, too? ...And I thought you were smarter than that, hedgehog..." He sighed shaking his head. "I don't get paid enough. Why doesn't Master Hand hire more people to work here? What do I look like, Superman!?"

Due to the pink puffball, Kirby, throwing a Smart Bomb instead of eating it as usual, it ended up blowing just outside of the Smash Mansion. The problem? Six Smashers were near the explosion. As a consequence, they all ended up getting blown away into the Smash Mansion's brick wall. They had to be grateful that they never received major injuries.

Still, it filled up Dr. Mario's plate. He knew himself that Kirby ate Smart Bombs all the time outside of matches. How he never ended up exploding at least one time was beyond him, along with anyone else he knew. To top it all of, the worst he ever did in response was a simple shrug.

Adding fuel to the fire, he was literally the only doctor in the mansion, and he had to be the 'mother' of six at once. Half of the patients that were injured weren't even considered to be the nice people ever, either.

The returning veteran thought that he would probably end up having a headache once their treatment was done.

"This is all Kirby's fault..." Pit mumbled with displeasure. "I know he's smarter than this, he should know better."

"Way to sound like a mother, wouldn't you say?"

"Nobody was talking to you, Pitoo." Pit disputed with his doppelganger with scrunched up eyebrows. "You wouldn't have any experiences of being a parent, anyway. You're just a clone of me."

"Like you wouldn't have any experiences of parenting, either?" He remarked with a slowly raised finger smirking.

"...Well, who asked you?" He questioned irritably raising his voice. "No one asked you to make a comment! When my back heals, you would have a broken neck as a follow-up to your concussion! ...OW!" He placed a hand on his lower back.

"Look, can you two just quit it?" Falco moaned with an ice pack on his head. "I don't want my head to be in pain any longer than I have to. You two should have been twin brothers with all that bickering..."

Sonic, too, had an ice pack over his head. "Well, sometimes you bicker with Fox. And most of the time, you're the one who starts it. What's the difference?"

"If you would just stay out of this, it would make a rather _great_ difference!" He responded, finally having the strength to open his eyes. "My head has to heal, and it can't if you keep flapping your mouth..."

"Flap?" He raised an invisible eyebrow. "Judging by your appearance, I would say that you're just mad that you can't fly."

"I SAID QUIET!" Dr. Mario screamed to the quartet of talkers. "I am about to be the next one who gets a headache, because guess what? I've become a mother of _six_ overnight! You guys ought to be grateful that I am not selfish and actually _care_ about you all! Suppose I was not here? You guys would have to deal with it the hard way!"

"You both sound like parents as a matter-of-fact." Mega Man butted in. "You two might as well marry each other."

"Ahem!"

"Sorry..."

He nodded as a warning. "Anyways, give me about thirty seconds, and I'll be back with medication. Unfortunately, five of you will have to be patient because of the fact there's only one me."

The mixture of veterans and newbies groaned simultaneously.

"However," He turned back to lift his index finger. "I'll first work with the one who is the most behaved, the one person, or Koopa that has not said a word thus far."

 _"Yes!"_ In truth, Bowser had to fight the urge to not enter into a raging fit. The closest he got to was when Sonic started speaking. He was standing right beside the king of the Dark Lands, for that matter. It was beyond everyone that he didn't have the sense to simply run out of the way saving himself. He was Mobius's fastest hedgehog, after all.

While Dr. Mario was gone, the female Wii Fit Trainer suddenly walked in. "Maybe if you all worked out more, you all would have never ended up in this situation. This is what happens when miss a _single_ workout."

"It was not as if we were all fast enough, minus Mr. Apparent Slowpoke over there." Pit angrily pointed at Sonic.

"Well, you two angels have the Power of Flight!" He defended himself glaring. "The both of you probably would have barely made it in time!"

"Silence!" The fitness Smasher interrupted. "You all can blame your own selves for this! Time for your punishment! When you six are healed up again, you all are to have encyclopedias on your backs as you hold the 'bridge' pose overnight!"

The injured fighters eyed her with dumbfounded, astonished, and angry facial expressions. "WHAT!?"

"Yep, you heard me!" She nodded, putting her bottle of water down on the nearby counter. "Unless you all want to perform harder workouts in the gym! May I remind you that Wario had to do the tree pose longer then he had to because he threw a piece of watermelon at me!?"

With some snickers heard from Pit, Sonic, and Falco, Wii Fit Trainer had apparently lost it. "You _dare_! That's it! The three of you are to hold three encyclopedias in each hand for exactly three hours!"

"Now, why would use assign us with a workout, _you_ can't even possibly accomplish!?" yelled Falco in defense.

In spite of the fact of him having a valid point, it was no use. There was no point to reason with her, since she was already upset. "You, four hours! Wanna try for five!? And just for that, you are to also practice with your personal hula-hoop."

Wii Fit Trainer cared about fitness so much, she actually had the nerve to give each and every fighter (including Dr. Mario) a personal hula-hoop they can work with. Obviously, it was pretty embarrassing to some. A few were a bit more unlucky than others, like Marth for example. He had to find out the hard way that he was being secretly recorded by Diddy Kong and was put on SmashTube, allowing not only the Smash World to see, but all of the worlds that had technology. Regardless of the fact that it was published just the previous week, it had already gained over five million views. The poor swordsman was still demanding the monkey to remove the video. He would have gone to Master Hand, but he wasn't in charge. His insane brother, Crazy Hand was since he had to travel for the week.

His fellow Smashers desired to joke at the bird as well, though the thought of the fitness newcomer made them shut their mouths in an instant. Hearing footsteps, they had completely forgotten about the current state they were in.

Dr. Mario had finally returned with a raised eyebrow as curiosity got the better of him. "So, what was all the noise about?"

"Greetings, Dr. Mario." Wii Fit Trainer greeted. "I was just assigning workouts for these people because they think that everything's a game."

The doctor version of the red-capped italian plumber knew that it was the result of something minor, yet again, but then he remembered about the headache that might come. He grinned in his mind. Maybe he could try to be on her side.

"...Well, who's the main one?"

 _"What!?"_ The sextet of males clamored inside their heads.

"Mr. Falco Lombardi." She replied, arms folded. "We should make a mental note that he is to hold three encyclopedias in each hand for four hours once he's back on his feet, even though I can simply do so on my agenda. Plus, he needs to work on his hula-hooping skills."

The poor friend of Fox McCloud facepalmed. "This is embarrassing..."

 _"Maybe **she's** the mother, after all." _Dark Pit said in his thoughts. _"I hope Dr. Mario enjoys being her husband..."_

"Very well." The doctor concluded as he walked over to Bowser. "Tell me where it hurts..."

He commenced on poking his left arm that got banged against the door, which due to his weight, he was actually able to make the whole door fall down, forcing a frightened Villager to nimbly leap out of the way. He was planning on watering his plants outside.

"OW!" He hollered when pressured near his bicep. "I'm glad I'm lucky enough that this is not a major injury. You all know I have eight kids..."

"Just why would you have so many children?" Mega Man had to ask. "Seven of them don't even look like you at all."

"Alright, then. I'm going to go get another ice pack, and then I'm gonna run with more tests." Their doctor forced their conversation to a halt.

"And I'd better be next." Sonic mumbled lowering his head. "My head's not going to be in pain all day."

"I heard that!" Dr. Mario swiftly rotated his body. "Learn to how patience every once in a while! That's why I gave you an ice pack for the time being! When it's your turn, I am going to have you X-Rayed!"

"Fine..." He rolled his eyes when he suddenly froze. "...Wait a minute... What's the date?"

"The first?" replied Pit.

"...Oh no..."

"Now, what?" Dr. Mario groaned in deep frustration. "What's the problem, now?"

"...I'm supposed to be doing a breakdancing contest with Falcon!"

Literally everyone else in the infirmary almost instantly fixed their eyes on the speedster with weird and confounded looks.

"...What?"

* * *

 **Yep, breakdancing.**

 **So in case you haven't noticed, including this, I've uploaded three fics in less than two hours. This is a first.**

 **And since some injuries weren't mentioned, I will list all of them here. Pit and Mega Man had back aches, Bowser had an injury done to his left arm, and Dark Pit, Sonic, and Falco all ended up with concussions... All Kirby's fault...**

 **Like/dislike? I encourage everyone to review.**

 **Questions:**

 **1\. Should Master Hand hire more people, or should Dr. Mario just man up and deal with it?**

 **2\. ...What is wrong with Wii Fit Trainer?**

 **3\. Who feels sorry for Marth?**


End file.
